The King Of My Heart

Prayer. It's one simple word that has so much power. It's one of the easiest things in the world to do, yet so many people don't do it. I want you to think about your best friend for a second. Think about what makes them your best friend. Most of you would probably agree, that conversations with this person is a big part of the reason they are your best friend. Another reason, is the time that you spend with them.

Growing up, my best friend's name was Carolyn. I remember how excited I was when my mom would let me go to her house, or her come to our house. We used to talk for hours on the phone. When I say hours, I mean hours. I remember once we were on the phone for 7 hours. We also used to write each other letters. It wasn't just one page letters, it was pages and pages of words that really didn't mean anything other than how happy we were to be friends. Ironically enough, a letter was also our last conversation. We don't talk anymore. And we aren't each other's best friend. Life just gets in the way sometimes.

When I turned 18, it seemed like my Mom went straight from Mother to Best Friend. I don't know what I would do without my Mom. She is my rock. She is my inspiration. She's the one I go to when I don't know what to do. I could spend all day, every day with her. I don't think there is anything that she doesn't know about me. Whenever I have made a mistake, her voice is the voice that lets me know that it will be okay. And that it's all gonna work out like it's supposed to. She encourages me like no other. She has always taken care of me and always had my back no matter what. I hope that I can become as strong as she is someday.

As a young adult, I would always think about my wedding, as most young women do. You always think about who the Groom will be, of course. But for me, the very next question was always, "Who will be my maid of honor?" I think this is a big question for those women who don't have a sister. I knew at that exact point in my life that I hadn't met my "Maid of Honor". I met that person in 2008. I knew when I met her that our friendship would be forever. Her name is Christy. And before you ask, yes. When I got married last year, Christy was my Maid of Honor. I wouldn't have ever asked any other person on earth to be that for me. Christy is the only friend I have ever had that felt close enough to me to be my sister. I can tell her anything. I know if I ever need her, she will be there for me. That's what true friendship is. They are there, no matter what. Good and bad.

Now, my very best friend is my husband. He has been since the day we met. I love spending time with him no matter what we are doing. We don't even have to talk, as long as we are with each other, I am happy. He is on my mind constantly. It's like I think about him and his spirit is with me every second, of every day. He's in my heart. He's in my mind. He's in every single thought throughout the day. Even if we are miles apart, he's there. One of my favorite quotes is from a movie, A Walk to Remember. "Our love is like the wind. I can't see it, but I can feel it." I can't imagine living my life without him by my side. He is my heart. My love. My everything.

It's funny when you think about all these attributes from the different relationships in your life. What if you put all of those attributes together? What would you have? Who would you have? My answer is simple. The King of my Heart. I am God's girl. Always have been. Always will be. Just this week, my thoughts have been taken over by how good God is to me. It started with a song by Zach Williams. It's called, "So Good To Me" and here are some of the lyrics.

"When day light breaks, with morning dew, You are, You are so good to me.
When evening comes, the day is through, You are, You are so good to me.
Your love is wild, Your promise true, You are, You are so good to me.
Your heart is kind, in all You do, You are, You are so good to me.
When blessings come, when life brings pain, You are, You are so good to me.
When Shadows fall, and seasons change, You are, You are so good to me.
On Heaven's shore, You'll call my name, You are, You are so good to me.
A thousand tongues, of angels say, You are, You are so good to me.
How perfect are your ways, How endless is Your grace, Forever I will sing Your praise.
You are, You are so good to me."

It's a very simple song that completely hit my heart in the right spot. I have sang this song about five hundred times this week, and each time it starts, I get chills. Today, when I heard it again, the thought came over me about how much I pray. Do I really pray enough? Do I really have the relationship with God that my heart needs? This is something very personal that I've not really shared with many people. I think the only person who knows is my husband. But maybe if I open up, you guys could pray for me about this issue. Sometimes, it's really hard for me to pray. Not because I don't want to, or I'm embarrassed or anything like that. Sometimes, it's because I've had a horrible day with horrible thoughts and I just don't feel worthy of talking to God. Sometimes, I struggle finding the words I want to say. If I could write to God, It would be a lot easier for me. But then I think about those conversations with all of the people I've listed above. I had a seven hour phone conversation with my childhood best friend, but I can't find the words to say to God?? What the heck?? But there is a verse that I am always reminded of.

"And the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. For example, we don't know what God wants us to pray for. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words. And the Father who knows all hearts knows what the Spirit is saying, for the Spirit pleads for us believers in harmony with God's own will." Romans 8:26-27

Which brings me to the second thing this week that have taken over my thoughts. Every morning when I'm getting ready for work, I listen to Christian music. I just want to start my day off right. I just have my phone on shuffle and listen to whatever is next. The other day, my favorite Third Day song came on. I can't tell you how many times I've heard the song, "May Your Wonders Never Cease". However, this time was different. It was one line in it that stuck out to me. It's a simple lyric that has stayed with me all week. "May Your wonders never cease, may Your Spirit never leave..." Wait a second. May Your Spirit never leave... My thoughts went to this. The Holy Spirit is always with me. It all of a sudden clicked with me. The Holy Spirit is always with me. May that Spirit never leave. I never want it to leave. This thought process led me to thinking about my relationship with God because I was thinking about how I always think about my husband. The Holy Spirit is with me every second, of every day. Much like the spirit of my husband is. And guess what else? "His love is like the wind. I can't see it, but I can feel it."

The third, and last thing that has taken over my thoughts this week was a song that was posted by a friend on Facebook. A song called, you guessed it, "King of My Heart". I had heard it many times before, but this time, it meant more. Why? Because it went right along with all of my thoughts throughout the week. And the lyrics to this song are so deep that I'm not even sure where to start. But here goes.

"Let the King of my heart be the mountain where I run,
the fountain I drink from, Oh He is my song.
Let the King of my heart be the shadow where I hide,
the ransom for my life, Oh He is my song.
Let the King of my heart be the wind inside my sails,
the anchor in the waves, Oh He is my song.
Let the King of my heart be the fire inside my veins,
And the echo of my days, Oh He is my song.
You are good, good, Oh. You are good, good, Oh."

Allow that to sink in for a second, and think about your relationship with God. Could you talk to him for seven hours on the phone? Or write him a ten page letter front and back? Could you tell Him how happy you are to be His friend? Is He your rock and inspiration? Is He the one you run to when you don't know what to do? Is there anything He doesn't know about you? Could you spend all day every day with Him? Can you tell Him anything? Can you count on Him to be there for you no matter what? Do you love spending time with Him? Is His spirit always with you? Is He in your every thought? Can you imagine your life without Him by your side? God is so good to us. He is all of this and so much more. He is the greatest friend we could ever ask for. Whenever we make mistakes, His voice tells us that everything is gonna be just fine. He is our encourager. He is our protector. He is our heart. He is our everything.

I think it's easy to forget what all God does for us. We are so busy asking Him for things, that we forget to thank Him for things. Someone once told me, "Try starting off your prayers by thanking Him and it will change your entire outlook on prayer." I believe that with my whole heart. Think about the good things, even on your worst day. It's hard to remember that we are worthy of God's love. It's hard to remember that He wants us on our good and bad days, even when we don't know what to pray. Is He the fountain you drink from? Is He the shadow where you hide? Is He the fire in your veins? Is He the King of your heart? Let Him be. Make Him be. Make Him the King of your heart. From now until kingdom come.

"We need never shout across the spaces to an absent God. He is nearer than our own soul, closer than our most secret thoughts." A.W. Tozer